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THE UGLY - Disorder

Look at me Joey! Thirty years old and all I've got to show is a beat-up car and some beat-up Iggy Pop records! - The Ugly vocalist Mike Nightmare to Joey Keithley (from his book, "I, Shithead")

...a Hoodlum Rocker's always got a crowbar in the trunk of the Cadillac and he don't use it to take tires off, he uses it to take heads off. - The Ugly drummer, Tony Torcher

Ah, so many tales to tell y'all about Toronto's Hoodlum Rockers, The Ugly. Formed in 1976, they were originally called The Rotten-- until a certain Johnny forced 'em to rethink that moniker... becoming (duh) The Ugly. Comprised of the above-quoted Tony & Mike, Sam Ugly mauled the bass & Raymi Gutter handled guitar chores. Unlike so many bands that play the badassery to the hilt, these nogoodniks were the real deal; In fact, it's amazing they managed to leave us with any recordings whatsoever as one member or another was seemingly always behind bars. It got so bad in fact, that singer Mike Nightmare often wore an S&M hood with big yellow sunglasses so's not to be recognized by the cops.

I could also tell ya how Mike would climb on stage wearing nothing but a piece of bologna (with a hole bitten into the center) wrapped around his weenie (keep in mind that GG Allin was nothin' more than a gushy Nikki Corvette groupie at the time), or how he managed to get his ass kicked royally by Thin Lizzy's Phil Lynott. I could even mention the incident captured in the film "Outrage" where they rushed the stage during the Viletones set because of their dismay at being excluded from the bill (which also included Simply Saucer, Battered Wives, Teenage Head and the Concordes). But, as Jenna Haze once said to me: "There comes a time when the yappin's over, and you get to the Box."



Mike Nightmare died in jail in 1998. This post is dedicated to him. RIP.

Look in the comments, Greedy. You might wanna type something in 'em while yer there, eh?